If You Can't Say Anything Nice, Don't Say Anything BaseBall

In honor of spring training, I thought I'd stick with the baseball theme for one more day and turn a triple play.

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Back in 1967 theater goers first heard Simon & Garfunkel's song, Mrs. Robinson, in "The Graduate." Simon finishes the song by paying homage to a baseball player with these lyrics:

Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?
A nation turns its lonely eyes to you
(Woo woo woo)
What’s that you say, Mrs. Robinson
‘Joltin Joe’ has left and gone away?
(Hey hey hey – hey hey hey)

TV shows actually took a long time to riff off these lyrics to honor DiMaggio and other fave players:

• Where Have You Gone, Jackie Robinson? (''Brooklyn Bridge,'' 12/11/1991)
  
• Where Have You Gone, Joe DiMaggio? (''Murphy Brown,'' 9/26/1994)
  
• Where Have You Gone, Joe DiMaggio? (''Step by Step,'' 4/28/1995)
  
• Where Have You Gone, Sandy Koufax? (''Cover Me: Based on the True Life of an FBI Family,'' 4/2/2000)

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While looking through ep titles, I was shocked — I say shocked — to find two shows refer to the famous double play combination from the very early 1900s, Tinkers to Evers to Chance:

• Tinker to Evers to Tucson (''Empty Nest,'' 11/26/1988)
  
• Tankers, Cadavers to Chance (''Dynasty,'' 2/9/1989)

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Even people who don't like baseball often use baseball terms. The most famous example? The bases and dating.

• Getting to First Base (''Homefront,'' 2/18/1992)
  
• Second Base (''Blossom,'' 9/16/1991)
  
• Home Run (''7th Heaven,'' 9/26/2005)

Astonished. Blossom and 2nd base? The family series, "7th Heaven," and sexual intercourse? Say it isn't so.